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I have a knicker analogy for you today… and rather a personal one.

I was getting dressed this morning in my gym gear and my partner commented on my knickers and that he thought they looked nice. My immediate response was to tell him “you don’t like these sorts of knickers!” at which point he then laughed and said “I try to give you a compliment and you tell me off!”.

On further reflection over the morning it made me think about why I would get defensive about such a comment instead of just graciously accepting it and basking in the glow of a compliment for a while.

I realised that the knickers in question, in this case a black and maroon lacy, ‘shorty’ type that doesn’t ride up when gymming but still feels feminine, were not what I was feeling defensive about, but more the bottom that was hiding inside them!

Having had various “what sort of knickers do you find attractive” conversations with my man over the years I knew that these short styles were not his preference, but the overriding factor of attractiveness came from the shape of the behind they were covering… and mine had grown somewhat over the 11 years we’ve been together!

However, after 10 months continued dedication in the gym and to healthy eating, my bottom of yesteryear has started to re-emerge, and with it a better appreciation of it from my chappy. I realised though, after the comments of the morning, that because I’m still focusing on the future goal and where I want to be, I wasn’t fully appreciating how far I’ve already come. I mean, this morning I’d turned unattractive knickers into attractive ones! That’s good going for a rainy Monday morning!

So, where the heck am I going with this and why am I telling you about my bottom and knickers when this is a blog about business and branding!?

Well, there is a link, I promise!

Mulling over all this made me think about women in general and then women in business.

You see, I hear it and see it a lot, women talking about how insecure they’re feeling about so many things when it comes to business:

  • Leaving the 9-5
  • Getting started
  • Going to a networking meeting
  • Writing a blog
  • Creating a newsletter
  • Selling a product
  • Launching a website
  • Speaking in public

The list goes on… and on… and on!

But how many times are you missing compliments?

So busy worrying about what you want things to be like and how you’d like to be different, do more, achieve more that you’re missing out on a wealth of wonderful feel-good moments that are just wishing they’d get acknowledged by you?

We learn new things every day. We grown and develop all the time. It’s incredibly easy to forget where we started and take a moment to just consider where we’ve come from… even in the last week I bet you’ve made things happen that the you of 5 years ago wouldn’t have been able to do?

How often are we complimented by those beginning their own journeys and instead of just saying “thank you” and enjoying a moment of acknowledging your own greatness, reply with some comment or other about how you’re “getting there” or “could do better” or “would’ve loved if it was just…”.

I’d bet that in the past 2 months you’ve complemented another person; having been genuinely inspired, motivated or impressed by what they’ve achieved. You haven’t done it with an agenda, it just felt right to let them know that you think they’re doing a good job.

How did they respond?

Take a moment now to think about your own interactions over the last month or two, has someone given you a compliment?

How did you respond?

Has someone insulted you?

I bet there are lots more compliments than insults and yet we do our best to focus on what we can improve. Don’t get me wrong, I’m all for striving forward but not at the cost of ignoring the now and rewarding ourselves for our part in making it what it is.

Take some time this week to jot down a few compliments you’ve received recently and allow yourself to be 100% pleased as punch. Have a love fest all of your own, all about you!

Think about what you’ve achieved since the 1st January this year:

  • What have you done?
  • What have you learned?
  • What have you made happen?
  • What have you improved?
  • What have you let go of?
  • What have you created?
  • Who have you made happy?
  • Who’s lives have you positively impacted through work or personally?

You are doing a great job!

You deserve to feel good!

Sod the insecurities for a moment… we all have them and right now they can go do something else.

Now is a moment for you to remember and celebrate the wondrousness that is you!

Go do it… now!

Let me know how you feel 🙂

Big love
Sophie
x

Knickers-Bums-and-Business

Author

8 Comments

  1. Thanks for this article, it was just what I needed to read. Having started my business this year I have been focusing of late on how much more I need to do, be and learn, which was a bit stressful. Your article made me stop and look back in amazement at how far I have come, and what I’ve achieved this year. It’s a much better perspective, so thanks.
    Sharon from O2B Organised

    • Sophie Jewry Reply

      Really glad to hear that Sharon. It is indeed a much more healthy perspective and all too often forgotten, despite best intentions. Every now and then we just need a reminder and I’m very happy to have been yours. Well done for all you’ve achieved so far 😉 x

  2. It applies to us blokes, too, you know (ok, not necessarily the knickers part… or not that we might admit to publicly…). Retraining yourself to remember the positive outcomes and compliments is tricky, when our memories seem to be conditioned to prioritise the negative stuff. (And the ‘leaving the 9 to 5’ part seems even harder when you’re the main breadwinner in the house.) But this is great for helping me to see how far along the road I actually am, rather than just focusing on how much further I’ve got to go to reach my ultimate goal.

    • Sophie Jewry Reply

      Thank you Chris, I knew it would apply to blokes too (even possibly the knickers part LOL)!! 😉 It’s a strange phenomena of the human race to focus too much on the negative instead of the positive and certainly something that needs a reminder now and then, even for the most positive amongst us! Glad this resonated with you and that there’s positive on both sides, how far you’ve come and the excitements still to follow. 🙂 x

  3. Niki Senior Reply

    This made me smile as I sport a pair of Yorkshire belly warmers :-). On a serious note & as a psychologist, many of my previous clients had struggled to accept love, love from others & love for themslves. To be able to give love, we have to accept it; even in the form of a simple compliment. So go one Sophie – feel free to compliment me on MY choice of pants ;-).

    • Sophie Jewry Reply

      LOL Yorkshire belly warmers. Possibly the comfiest pants in the world ever? 😉 As you say, I think lots and lots of people are craving love but struggle to truly give and receive it. Sad state of affairs really. Baby steps mean we can strive for acceptance of self and love our bodies and minds for what they are: magical things that enable us to do incredible things daily 🙂 x

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